The Suit is a type of Autumn Person identified by Runcible Shaw.
Overview[]
The Suit is an insidious and crafty beast. While some Seelie changelings attest that the Greater Suit is easily identifiable by their choice of clothing, the pessimistic Unseelie see "being a suit" as something more akin to a disease: a sickness that's difficult to detect, yet highly infectious in an inclosed office.
Suits are masters of camouflage. Some are actually real people who are capable of setting aside their feelings and ethics for the sake of serving a wealthy company. (This variety can be identified by its plaintive mating call: "It's only a job! It's only a job!") Others are highly banal humans who define their identities by their job titles, define "loyalty" as unquestioning obedience, and justify their actions by their salaries. If an oil tanker crashes in Alaska, if someone in the Third World works for low wages while making cheap goods for the Company, or some "cog" in the machine of a corporation is driven to drink by their dehumanizing job, that's someone else's problem.
Habitat[]
Most Suits hide in the fortress of their workplace from nine to five, but lately, this guideline has become less accurate. The "workaholic" will often stay at the office quite late, while the descendent of "yuppie scum" can carry out their duties anywhere thanks to the assistance of laptop computers, cell phones, beepers, and other similar devices.
Identification[]
Suit society requires elaborate rituals, many of which are performed for inscrutable reasons. Like a hive of bees endlessly dancing around each other in a hive or a swarm of cockroaches endlessly paying obeisance to a pile of dung, a team of Suits slowly make their "dances" more elaborate as they gather credit in their bank accounts.
Some philosophical changelings insist on making a finer distinction between the species od Suits. Can someone infiltrate a team of Suits and still remain human? If someone isn't paid a lot by a Company, can they still be a Suit or are they merely a victim? Is the distinction between a Suit and a Cog merely a matter of salary? Some Suits also show signs of wanting to be human, such as organizing company volleyball games, dancing to bad '80s rock and drinking cheap beer while wearing ties around their foreheads, or insisting that they're just doing their job to support their families. Simplistic changelings respond to this ambiguity by Kenning the Banality of a Suit and acting on that guidance.
Encounters[]
How impudent of him to come into my freehold so brusquely! He wore a three-piece blue suit with a power tie and shoes fresh from a shine at the airport. He smiled, hoping I would trust him. Suits smile real well. He held out a business card and was eager to shake my hand. The briefcase he carried never strayed far from his side. Behind him was his flunky. Yuppie scum. Double-tall non-fat vanilla latte and biscotti in his hands, laptop case slung over his left shoulder, pink polo shirt, yellow sweater tied around his neck, tan slacks, loafers, and thick-framed sunglasses. He smiled too. Or maybe he was just baring his teeth.
"Now, about the children's book you've written," the suit began. "I think we can increase the sales of your book by using some creative marketing. When you've been in marketing as long as I have, you realize the potential of cross-selling. In exchange for a small percentage of your profits, this line of children's clothing our company has designed is practically free advertising for your book!"
"Oh yes," flunky added. "We'll make Mr. Bunny's Happy Day a classic in no time! We'll increase his visibility on the Recognizability Index, streamline his appearance based o user surveys, and take a few of the more objectionable passages out. And look at the lovely prototypes we have of the jackets!
"And the lining is made of real rabbit fur," the Suit continued. "Now, shall we discuss this over lunch? I'm dying for a bite," he said.
So I bit him. What can I say? The classics always work.
References[]
- CTD. The Autumn People, pp. 46-47.