User blog:SensibleCenobite/Product Review: Hail Satan.

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This is just fiction, duh!

'''SNOWFLAKE TRIGGER WARNING: Dear Snowflakes, go read another blog, you will not like this one {London}. It's full of adult children with bundles of humor, creativity, and honesty. If you read my blog, I'm not harassing you, heads up. I did put a joke too close too the warning in one post {humor seems to be offensive since 2015}, so I'll put the joke of the day at the bottom from here on out {WIN/WIN}.'''

'''WARNING: It seems that my couched vocabulary isn't cutting it in the warning section, so here is an amended warning. FANDOM does have wikis that are all ages, but White Wolf products, articles, and blogs on this wiki are for adults only, since they deal with topics like becoming a demi god, black magic, blood drinking, cannibalism, casual mass murder, child kidnapping, demons, foul language, Frankenstein creatures, God, goddesses, gods, Mummies, nuclear missiles, rape, religion, serial killers, slavery, snuff films, theft, The Robot Devil, Vampires, Werewolves, white magic, Wraiths, and so on. Would you let your kids on the “IT” wiki {Great book}? It's not my responsibility to monitor your children, so please feel free to do that yourself, or get a parental lock on your internet browser {Your kids probably already have the password}. If my blog offends you at ANY point, you have the option to not read it. I don't get paid for any posts I do. I don't take credit for this, but it sounds perfect, “Getting offended by something on the internet is like choosing to step in dog crap instead of walking around it.” If I scream into your face, that's a little different.'''

'''HEADS UP: My blog is for me, but I have comments enabled, cause why not, but it's for me {I still adore my fellow Chantry members!}. I'm an arrogant, selfish, narcissistic, demon worshiping, demon possessed, lizard blooded writer. Hail Ananasa! Hail Cthulhu!, Hail Leviathan! Hail Nergal! Hail Ralph! Hail Satan! Jesus is a fantastic investor! I do however take requests, and love to work on pen and paper concepts with anyone who asks. Freedom of speech is the only safeguard against tyranny, so feel free to comment below, and notice how you may type in foul language without stars replacing the characters. If you do decide to comment, you would technically be harassing me, especially if the post is a month old, which is fine. You may in fact insult this blog AND my character, however liable and death threats will NOT be tolerated.'''

Minor Credits: His Majesty Mr. Russel Hammond for protecting my freedom of speech all the way from Brazil, IanWatson for creating the wiki, Atvelonis the wiki manager, the top contributors for the week [BroDavid, RinVindor, Mr. Grinder], new contributors [The Youth Counselor, MrNutButter, Loub], FANDOM, and lastly my Chantry for liking the chromatic orbs.

Major Credits: Sebastian Lindeberg

'''WARNING: POTENTIAL SPOILER ALERT. IF YOU ARE NOT A STORY TELLER THIS COULD RUIN SOME IMPORTANT SECRETS FOR YOU.'''

TheBeardedDragon's overall opinion of [Hail Satan] A+/D+: Since we're in a cancel culture where Victorian commie mommies need to silence everyone, I'm going to give this product an A+. I honestly should give this a D+/C-, since it's a bit vulgar in a childish way, but hey, that's freedom of speech now isn't it, and the Black Dog Studio warning label is on the front cover. I only paid fifty cents for this product and now it's one dollar at DriveThruRPG, so it's worth a quick read to remind yourself you could at least do an equivalent or better job. This product is for you if you ever wanted to play a coterie of Baali vampires, called the “Motherfuckers”, that are still anti heroes at the end of the day. The coterie makes a deal with a demon to get revenge on their sire, and the demon agrees to give them their souls back if they kill their sire, the demon's old servant, in one weeks time. The players are given many options for their start rides, such as a moldy RV, a bunch of motorcycles, or a haunted VW bus that gets repaired by undead hippies {My favorite}. I like how Sebastian gives us three main locations that the coterie must go to in any order to defeat a piece of the main boss {Satanic convent, motel forgotten by God, and Satan's Summer camp}. The Satanic convent may be a little over the top for some groups since it potentially involves the sacrifice of sixty six children, but remember that the coterie is there to stop them, not join in for fun {I hope}. Sebastian was even nice enough to throw in a decent list of random encounters, which are so underrated in modern RPGs from what I've gathered on the interwebs. Overall this is a very short product to work with {Eight pages}, but any Storyteller worth their salt should be able to beef it up where needed, and tone down some of the vulgarities if it's over the top for them.

Final Grades and Opinions: I bought the pdf version off of DriveThruRPG and I don't own the hard copy. I don't get paid by White Wolf,  DriveThruRPG, or anyone else for product reviews.

Reading [Was the book a fun read, clarity of text]: C-, This product is only eight pages long, it kept my interest the whole time, and the text was clear.

Writing [Spelling errors, typography, cohesion]: D-, You can tell that English is Sebastian's second or third language, but the text is still understandable.

Characters [Amount, quality, context, immersion]: B+, This is one place this product actually shines. There are a lot of character that are funny to me.

Locations [Amount, quality, context, immersion]: B+, Sebastian gives us three main locations to work with and their surrounding area, in addition to a random encounter table.

Artwork [Context immersion, quality, time spent staring at pictures]: D-, The cover of this book is nice enough, but that's all the art one gets.

Joke of the Day: There was a war between France and England and an English officer was captured by the French. A French soldier comes over and asks the English officer, “Why do the English wear red coats? It doesn't seem like there is much of a tactical advantage to it.” The English officer thinks for a second and replies, “We notice that when people get shot and see all the blood on them, they freak out, so we have red coats so the blood blends in.” The French soldier says, “That's a great idea, it makes much more sense now”, and from that day forward the French started to wear brown pants.

Circles are complete; Triangles are immutable. Hallelujah, Hail Cthulhu, Praise Evolution,

TheBeardedDragon